I used to hate maths (math to my US friends)
I used to tell the story I was ‘bad’ at it.
I used to believe that me ‘n numbers had a shitty relationship.
TRUE STORY: I once topped the state in a maths competition in school that I sat for as a joke.
It was a joke because although I ‘got by’ in maths, it was NOT my forte. (I was an English geek)
It was a multiple choice thing and, like the creative rebel that I was, I intuitively answered the whole exam without reading a single question.
I guessed -: ‘a’, ‘c’, ‘d’, ‘a’, ‘b’, ‘c’, ‘d’…. etc etc
And got the top marks in the whole state.
I was about to be sent to the nationals?!?
Of course when I was sent before the principle, who was as surprised as I was that I’d managed to knock the school maths stars off their perches, and fessed up… instead of getting some sort of gold medal in goddammed intuition I was told off for being a time waster and a smart alek.
So my story has always been that I’m no numbers gal.
But last night I dreamed of maths.
I dreamed of equations.
I dreamed of how everything EQUALS everything.
It was all sooooo clear to me!
You see, in an equation everything on one side MUST equal everything on the other side (I know THAT much!).
They must balance each other out, perfectly.
And that little ‘=’ sign is the magic balancer.
It says it is so; and so it is.
What I am seeing that in my life that I am that equals sign.
I am the balancer.
Every vibration that I energetically put out finds its equal through me.
So if I put out the energy of lack… I manifest its equal.
If I put out the energy of acceptance… I manifest its equal.
If I put out the energy of fear or anger or hatred or disappointment… I manifest all of their equals into my life experience.
Which begs the question…
IF this is true (and it is), why, oh why would I put out the energy of ANYTHING unwanted EVER?
And yet I do – ALL the time.
And then I am surprised and annoyed and upset and angry that I’m manifesting such shit in my life..
And then guess what?
(you know what I’m going to say, right?)
Because I’m now vibrating with annoyance and upsetness… Hey presto!
In mathematical perfection here THEY come, marching obediently into my life…
No lessons to be learned.
No karma, or fate, or wrath of god.
Kylie ‘the equalizer’ Ansett
P.S. Got a book in you dying to get out?